First Round
EAST
Cleveland Cavaliers (1) VS Detroit Pistons (8)
Cavs in 5. The Pistons steal one at Cleveland (Game 2), wake up call for the Cavs and all the Kobe fans go insane but Cavs finish them off.
Boston Celtics (2) VS Chicago Bulls (7)
Celtics in 4. Celtics will pack the paint and Derrick Rose will die.
Orlando Magic (3) VS Philadelphia 76ers (6)
Magic in 4. Dwight Howard will average about 6 blocks a game in this series because no one in Philly can shoot but Dwight Howard is a fucking beast in the paint.
Atlanta Hawks (4) VS Miami Heat (5)
Heat in 6. Wade averages near a triple double in this series.
WEST
Los Angeles Lakers (1) VS Utah Jazz (8)
Lakers in 5. Jazz are still a pretty good team but their record has been hurt by their recent suckage and also a bunch of injuries so they're no typical 8th seed. The Lakers wins should be rather close wins that are around 10 points.
Denver Nuggets (2) VS New Orleans Hornets (7)
Hornets in 7. Interesting match up. Chris Paul vs Chauncey Billups will be quite nice to see. Chris Paul will put up godly numbers. X Factor is J.R. Smith.
San Antonio Spurs (3) VS Dallas Mavericks (6)
Spurs in 5. The 'don't write off the Spurs' thing begins. A few smartasses pop up and say 'oh I've been saying all season long, don't write off the Spurs!!'
Portland Trail Blazers (4) VS Houston Rockets (5)
Rockets in 6. Rockets should have swept the season series but Roy hit that crazy 3. Greg Oden slows down Yao effectively before picking up his 5th foul in 3 minutes of action. This will be an interesting series!
Second Round
EAST
Cleveland Cavaliers (1) VS Miami Heat (4)
Cavs in 5. Wade puts up subpar shooting numbers but attempts like 20 free throws each game.
Boston Celtics (2) VS Orlando Magic (3)
Celtics in 7. Will probably be one of the best series. Depends on how KG's doing but Celtics should be able to contain Dwight Howard effectively and should also be able to close out on those open shooters.
WEST
Los Angeles Lakers (1) VS Houston Rockets (5)
Lakers in 5. I wish things would be different but this Laker team just fucking rapes the Rockets. Rockets will play a good 3 quarters of basketball for the whole series but the Lakers will win somehow.
New Orleans Hornets (7) VS San Antonio Spurs (3)
Spurs in 7. Because Spurs are good even without Ginobili and you shouldn't write them off. Roger Mason hits 3 3s in the 4th quarter of Game 7.
Conference Finals
EAST
Cleveland Cavaliers (1) VS Boston Celtics (2)
Cavs in 6. Witness.
WEST
Los Angeles Lakers (1) VS San Antonio Spurs (3)
Lakers in 6. Bynum + Gasol is too much to handle for Duncan.
THE FINALS
Lakers win because they're fucking stacked.
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